The lovebug bit me deep and hard and drew blood,and now I feel the pain.

The sun casts a bloody red light over my horizon, while her sky is lit with a golden hue..She is the star burning brightest in her constellation, as I am just a lone meteor drawn in by her gravity.

I wish I could just open up and talk to her..but somehow..words fail me when I look at her..even the slightest glance in her direction shakes me.Best I can do for now is to let her read my book..let her get a sense of me..just need her to notice me for who I am.

I've impulsively given my heart to one who is closer to perfection then many, and now she grasps it in her hands, squeezing it so tight, it almost hurts. But she doesn't know it, and she likely never will.


Her smile is all I could wish for. Dazzling. Mesmerizing. It diverted me from treading my lonely path in life to chase after that vision of happiness, companionship, and love. What I had ever truly wanted, all that I could ever want, it just came like that. Taking shape in the form of her. But still very out of my reach. Even though she was like a few seats away.

I don't have it in me to burst her bubble, the stable balance of life she already is in. I don't want to be a disturbance. So, I just admire her from afar, not wanting to taint her with the darkness in my mind, pouring my soul into the only outlets I know, reading & writing. I have never been one to talk much. I hope against hope that, maybe, just maybe, in some miraculous way, that she'll come to find me in the process of reading my book, to love me as I am.

Maybe it's just wishful thinking, but somehow, I can see a future with her.

Yeah, it's wishful thinking. I'm not good for her. Lolx

Night. I love you. =P

Sigh.

Today was a freaking bore. Didn't do much.Just went on comp and surfed till 5 when my sis came to take me to La Night Market near my home.Now it's bout 11.08 night time but bedtime's far off.



I had a really disturbing nightmare last night/this morning. Was walking round some mall with no one in it, but then as I walked on, people just appeared, like Poof! ...yeah, creepy huh?Well,after some randomness I walked on again then I met her. We walked around for a while, going up escalators and stuff, then *gasps* she held my hand and I held her waist. Yeah yeah say what you want, but it was only dreaming dammit.
Anyways, as we walked down another floor we kinda walked the wrong way to some atrium thingy(dunno what you call it) and got lost,cause the way behind us was suddenly blocked with some sorta black wall and there was no one around.We freaked out and ran till she found a REALLY steep staircase that led down the the ground floor and people. She just ran down the stairs like it was nothing and I almost fell down trying to go after her, only saving myself by grabbing on to the railing.I could feel the height really affecting me as I started to feel very very dizzy.

Oh this blog version of my nightmare is incomplete. I'm putting it in my novel, which is underway now.

Wrote this @ 11pm yesterday (4/10) Posted this today cause I'm lazy.

damn moral

omg its 12 in the morning and I'm doing HOMEWORK!
yes I did just say that.
I'm doing homework for once
shit.


Can't stop thinking bout you.
Hope you like my book.

You enthrall me so.
I can't even think coherently when I look at you.
Yes you have that effect on me.

I know I might not be a part of you.
But never mind.
Cause I don't wanna do anything that might unbalance the course of your beatiful life.
I do hope you will share your pain with me though, if you would.
Cause I wanna know what scares you at night.
So that I may ward off those fears for you.
But even so, I will not let my pain be yours.
It hurts badly enough.
I don't want you to feel that pain as well.


Let these tears turn into snow as they fall from me.